maquisleader:

It’s a million laughs around the Science Bros

obshasatumbleriguess:

baconbroderick:

The most important .gif

If those hills were alive, they ain’t now…

obshasatumbleriguess:

baconbroderick:

The most important .gif

If those hills were alive, they ain’t now…

notkatniss:

im laughing so hard this pic looks like it belongs on joffrey’s instagram or something like “king’s landing vacay gettin tipsy with the betrothed #turnup #nofilter”  

notkatniss:

im laughing so hard this pic looks like it belongs on joffrey’s instagram or something like “king’s landing vacay gettin tipsy with the betrothed #turnup #nofilter”  

I have lived a thousand lives and I’ve loved a thousand loves. I’ve walked on distant worlds and seen the end of time. Because I read.
                                                        — George R.R. Martin 

the-awesome-adventurer:

the-awesome-adventurer:

the-awesome-adventurer:

I think the snapchats of my math teacher are the only thing I’ll be remembered for and I’m okay with that

I got suspended, Thursday school, and moved to an entirely different classroom because of this post.

I JUST FOUND OUT THEY BANNED SNAPCHAT ON MY SCHOOLS SERVER BECAUSE OF THIS OMFG

wolverxne:

Magic light | by: [Evgeni Dinev] 

wolverxne:

Magic light | by: [Evgeni Dinev

land-city:

Sacrament of Wilderness by Markus | Flickr
Geiranger, Møre og Romsdal Fylke, Norway

land-city:

Sacrament of Wilderness by Markus | Flickr
Geiranger, Møre og Romsdal Fylke, Norway
One: Buy condoms. Buy them and keep them with you at all times, and use them before you are asked to use them. And use them every time. The peace of mind you allow your partner will free her to be vulnerable with you, and that, my son, is exactly what sex is about. Condoms are sexy. In fact, call buying condoms foreplay.
(Footnote: If you are too embarrassed to buy condoms, you are not ready to have sex.)

Two: Kissing is not merely foreplay. Spend entire evenings making out on the couch while fully clothed. Believe me, dry-humping rocks.

Three: Sex is not just about friction. It’s about emotion. Stop trying to find her clitoris and find her heart. Because then she’ll help you find her clitoris.

Four: If you really wanna know how to please a woman, ask her how she masturbates. Then do that. A lot. If she claims she doesn’t masturbate, offer to take her shopping for a vibrator so you can both learn the vocabulary of her body together.

Five: Don’t put anything in her butthole you wouldn’t want in your own.
(Footnote: Try a pinky finger, it’s kinda awesome.)

Six: When you go down on her—and you will go down on her, and if you are my son, you will be amazing at it—tell her how good she tastes. Stop in the middle and kiss her deeply so she knows how good she tastes. Do the same when she goes down on you.

Seven: A simple Google search will yield 1,327 euphemisms for male masturbation, yet only 23 for female masturbation. If guys spent less time jacking off and more time jilling off, this world would be a happier place.

Eight: Everything you need to know about the importance of the clitoris is in the movie Star Wars. You are Luke Skywalker piloting your penis-shaped X-Wing Fighter deep inside her trench. Remember: seventy percent of all Death Stars cannot be blown up through penetration of the trench alone. It must be through focused contact with that little exhaust port at the top of the trench. Otherwise, any explosions you experience will be merely Hollywood special effects.

Nine: Just because you come doesn’t mean she has, so don’t you dare come before her. Focus completely on your partner. Don’t worry about gettin’ yours, you’re a guy. You always get yours. Your job is to make sure she’s gettin’ hers.

Ten: If sex with your partner lasts no longer than this poem, you are not making love. You are masturbating with her body instead of your hand. Shame on you. Go back to step one. You’ve got a lot of learning to do.
Love, Dad. -Big Poppa E., “How To Make Love”   (via 2977miles)

Jack Gleeson - Good Guy vs Evil Guy

And then we never spoke again. -my 6 word story (via un8common)

deersandowls:

You know i see a lot of people complaining about their stomach when they sit down… I have rolls too! So just get used to it girls. :)

pmon3y69:

drdawg:

my friend Pete literally makes me cry with his snap stories

this is me, i am pete, love me 

superwholocked-in-albion:

jeankd:

thegoddamazon:

The most important line in the whole damn song. MESSAGE.

The only historically accurate line in the whole film. 

excuse u

superwholocked-in-albion:

jeankd:

thegoddamazon:

The most important line in the whole damn song. MESSAGE.

The only historically accurate line in the whole film. 

excuse u

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